Relic Community Quotes Database

<Skwerl> WHAT THE FUCK
<Skwerl> my fish fucking commited suicide
<Elukka|DoW> gah?
<Tiresias> it couldn't take living with you anymore?
<Tiresias> :/
<Water> did he play a little game of hangman?
<Skwerl> I dont know, but when I found it, its head was stuck under a rock
<Skwerl> I think the rock crushed its head
<Jianaran> poor fishy.
<Water> then it was a homicide
<Jianaran> A moment of silence, please, gentlemen.
<Water> LOUD NOISES
* Jianaran slaps Water around a bit with a large trout
<Jianaran> appropriate.

<BSFoxi> Squid is like that.
<Gblazen> eh?
<BSFoxi> He is a Force of Nature, noone controls him, and he's fun to watch, but he's pretty much random and if he decides to layeth the smack down on your house, then you're fucked.

<Elukka> i'm sick so im home and boredom is taking over
<Tails> entertain yourself
* Fixer-at-work has joined #homeworld
<Tails> by telling me a story
<Tails> here ill start it
<Tails> This is the story of Grodon the Spack
<Elukka> who travelled the endless voids of spacelol.
<Fixer-at-work> To search for the power of the ultimate ROFL.
<Elukka> however
<Tails> Grodon was a homely fellow, and never quite quick on the draw
<Tails> His transport consisted of a crew including himself and his loyal partner Red
<Tails> Red, although a tad more intelligent than Grodon, was too annoying to function in society
<Elukka> Red was one of the elusive beings called Ninjapirates
<Fixer-at-work> Brutally scarred for life in the conflict against the Cannibal Vikings.
<Elukka> One day, Grodon thought he had finally found the ultimate ROFL
<Void> but it was just a LOL
<Elukka> Nevertheless, a console on the transport exploded of laugter.
<Elukka> *laughter
<Fixer-at-work> Leading to an inquest as to why all the consoles in the main bridge were filled with highly explosive materials.
<Elukka> It was revealed to be an assassination attempt by..
<Void> blood sucking robot ninjas
<Void> on the order of...
<Elukka> DYN, the master of the universe
<Void> It turned out that Red is the last Ninjapirate
<Void> the only one capable of challenging Dyn
<Void> using his magic sword of lollerskates
<Elukka> After a long and hard journey, Grodon and Red finally arrived at the Throne of the Universe, Where Capital Letters Were Used to Emphasise its Importance
<Fixer-at-work> Shocked to discover that someone had left the seat up, and it hadn't been cleaned for months.
<Elukka> They found a note, explaining that Dyn was no longer Star God and had proceeded to rule some corner of a network known as the Intarwebs
<Elukka> because being the master of the universe was way too much work.
<Fixer-at-work> Although the wages of sin were death, the hours were good and you got full dental.

<Cyberbob> QUIT YO JIBBER JABBER
<Cyberbob> YOU AIN'T HURT, YOU ARE PATHETIC
<Cyberbob> IF I EVER CATCH YOU ACTIN' LIKE A CRAZY FOOL AGAIN, YOU GONNA MEET MY FRIEND PAIN!
* Afoxi is now known as PAIN
<PAIN> hi everyone
<Cyberbob> ;p
<PAIN> Sorry, i don't know that guy.
* PAIN points at Cyberbob.

<Caesar_Lab> Jinks kicked her in the throat during sex
<Afoxi> It's awesome to watch IRC and read minute details everyone's sex lives (or lack thereof) are, but TMI.
<Cyberbob> HAHA

<Alliance> btw, the knock on the door, thats the mossad coming to ask you some questions
<Tiresias> fucking mossad always wasting my time

<Caesar> it's a German car
<Caesar> so it is clean, efficient, and does its best driving over Poland

<SquidDNA> So this sales rep walked in
<SquidDNA> And began talking about a new cloning strategy
<SquidDNA> That was proven and being published by
<SquidDNA> *Gordon Freeman* at Harvard University
<SquidDNA> "Gordon Freeman" I said
<SquidDNA> "Gordon Freeman!" she replied.
<Someguy|office> did you make a comment about half life?
<SquidDNA> I was struggling not to burst into laughter the entire rest of the spiel
<SquidDNA> No, she obviously had no idea
<SquidDNA> The one Free Man was an MIT graduate remember
<nyyti|BreakingOut> hahhaa nice
<SquidDNA> I did say later "..by Gordon Freeman"
<SquidDNA> "Yes.. you've heard of him?"
<SquidDNA> "There's a fictional Gordon Freeman."
<SquidDNA> I should have said something like "I'm very familiar with his work"
<NovaBurn> im familar with his work in high-energy theorectial physics and materials
<SquidDNA> I read his paper on combined arms and urban assault!
<NovaBurn> and dark matter reactor stability
<Aegelward> his PHD in the application of the crowbar in the modern scientific environment?

<Vaarok> OH MY GOD
<Vaarok> I HAVE SEEN THE UNPOSSIBLE
<Vaarok> IT IS! IT IS!
<deadguy> finally caught yourself having sex?
<nyyti> ?
<Vaarok> I just was browsing said link, www.farmersonly.com
<Vaarok> There's a fat-gir/cute-girl picture
<Vaarok> AND THE PERSON WHO POSTED IT IS THE CUTE GIRL IN THE PICTURE!
<Vaarok> Unpossible!
<Hiigara> hahaha
<Hiigara> farmers only
<Vaarok> IT'S *always* the ugly one
<deadguy> it's got to be a porn site
<Hiigara> must...stay...in...chair...
<Vaarok> OMGWTF
<Vaarok> Nope
<Vaarok> I shit you not
<deadguy> oh my god
<Vaarok> Indeed
<deadguy> it's match.com for people who smell of manure
<Vaarok> And that is important
<Vaarok> Farmers are 2% of the populace
<Vaarok> And it's completely different socially, economically, and lifestyle-wise from most every other profession
<Vaarok> So shit, I'm goin' looking for cowgirls
* Hiigara cackles
<deadguy> yeah, living off government subsidies is totally different than being homeless
<deadguy> :D
<Vaarok> Deady, only half the site is devoted to Canada
* deadguy tips
<deadguy> well played!

<Hiigara> The flowers you sent me were lovely, but I wish you hadn't sent them.
<Hiigara> From my point of view there is nothing between us and never will be so
<Hiigara> you sending me anything is a bit inappropriate. I really just hope that
<Hiigara> you move on and are happy. I will be mailing you the necklace because
<Hiigara> I cannot accept it. I'm sorry.
<Hiigara> motherfucker
<Hiigara> I HATE COPY PASTE
* Quits: Hiigara (Quit: ( www.nnscript.de :: NoNameScript 4.1 :: www.regroup-esports.com ))

<Void> well, i had to remove the protective plastic thing
<Void> now it is all sticky and dirty
<Hand> that's what she said

<Trinity> so... in making my babysitter risk assessment
<Trinity> should I go with the reporting statistics
<Trinity> or the retrospective self reporting ones?
<Trinity> Perhaps I should hire gay male babysitters for my daughter
<Trinity> any stats on that?
<Hiigara> they just paper bag it and go for the butt
<Trinity> that is so wrong
<Trinity> someone quote that for posterior
<SquidDNA> posterity?
<Trinity> indeed
<SquidDNA> Oh wait

<NovaBurn> ok so i got a thing of backup glasses for my contacts
<NovaBurn> and i havent worn glasses in probably 10 years
<SquidDNA> a thing of backup glasses for your contacts
<SquidDNA> ..does it sync wirelessly?
<NovaBurn> ;\
<SquidDNA> In that time have you forgotten what glasses are?
<NovaBurn> no
<NovaBurn> i just now put them on
<SquidDNA> okay what is a thing of glasses
<NovaBurn> a pair of glasse
<NovaBurn> s
<SquidDNA> are you drunk?
<NovaBurn> its fucking wierd
<NovaBurn> loosk like shit is moving when the rest is all static
<SquidDNA> I'll take that as a yes

<Hyperian> what would the world be without power rangers to protect us
<Zepherian> hetero

<Zepherian> seems being a couch potato with the reflexes of a dead possum is actually bad for gaming
<Zepherian> who would have thought it?
<Zepherian> :p
<Afoxi> uhm...
* Afoxi measures his reflexes on the reflexes-o-meter.
* Afoxi sees the rating "Dead Possum".
* Afoxi kicks machine.
* Afoxi still sees "Dead Possum".
* Afoxi cries in a corner.

<SquidDNA> Megaman, you know Mark Twain's definition of a Yankee?
<GenAmonX2K> No, but I do know his definition of Spinal Meningitis
<GenAmonX2K> "My daughter died of it while I was on vacation :("
<SquidDNA> hahahahahah
<GenAmonX2K> Yeah, that's right, Clemens. What you gonna do?
<SquidDNA> That's terrible.
<GenAmonX2K> oh, I'm gonna pay for that one in the afterlife
<SquidDNA> He's gonna beat the shit out of you.
<GenAmonX2K> he is
<Zepherian> so is his daughter
<SquidDNA> No
<SquidDNA> He could give a shit
<SquidDNA> It's the emoticon
<SquidDNA> He will kill you for that
<GenAmonX2K> oh
<GenAmonX2K> sorry
<Pijama> Mark Twain kicks serious ass as a corpse
<GenAmonX2K> :{(
<GenAmonX2K> there
<GenAmonX2K> mustache
<SquidDNA> hahahahah
<Pijama> Be afraid

<&Mnementh> if your balls dont touch it isnt gay
<GenAmonX2K> if your balls don't touch then what's the point?

<Aegelward> something is siriusly wrong with silver_wolf
<Dyntheos> he likes animals
<Dyntheos> in a bad way
<Gblazen> Beastiality
<Gblazen> Or furry?
<Dyntheos> yes that's it
<Jianaran> Wolves
<Dyntheos> both

<Gblazen> We aren't white supremicists, femnazis, or religious fundamentalists
<Sev> except when deadguy lets his magic work...

<Pijama> "HE DIED NOT KNOWING THE EMBRACE OF A WOMAN"
* Zepherian has joined #homeworld
<Pijama> rofl
<Pijama> XD
<Afoxi> lol
<Pijama> PERFECT TIMING

<SquidDNA> oranj bocks
<SquidDNA> I'm not even that thrilled about it
<SquidDNA> I got it for ep2 and portal
<SquidDNA> Tf2 came free basically
<SquidDNA> the character videos are pure gold of course
<Afoxi> i got it entirely for portal and tf2
<Trizzdog> i wish i had money for it
<Someguy> i got it for everything
<Someguy> except half life 2
<Someguy> heh
<Skwerl> you can give hl2 away as a gift
<Skwerl> but who doesnt own a copy these days
<Someguy> yah...
<Trizzdog> i got HL2 free with my cpu
<SquidDNA> Wait I thought Afoxi was playing a DEMO of HL2 earlier today
<Afoxi> YEAH! WHO DOESNT HAVE A COPY THESE DAYS?
* Afoxi hushes Squid.
<SquidDNA> hhahaha
<Afoxi> =(
<Afoxi> Well, i do own a copy now...

<Akranadas> woo, University Acknowlgded my application. Now all I have to do is wait...
<molo> where's University Acknowlgded?
<molo> ;\
<Akranadas> :|
<Akranadas> i would so ban you if you were so sexy
<Akranadas> *weren't
<molo> i know

<SquidDNA> Some guy on the university mailing list was desparate to sell his laptop
<SquidDNA> $1200 laptop for $1000!
<SquidDNA> I replied I have $700!
<SquidDNA> "lol!"
<SquidDNA> 1 week later
<SquidDNA> "deal!"
<Martian> haha
<Sev> score

//Bargainz, lulz//

<deadguy|work> moe hi!
<Moe> heya deadie
<Akranadas> \o Moe
<deadguy|work> moe, I need beer
<deadguy|work> when does your country open its doors for beer
<Akranadas> my countries always open
<deadguy|work> sounds good
<Someguy|office> hahaha
<Weavern> wouldent it just be easier to come to canada to get booze then australia
<Ap0k> <16:07:23> <@Akranadas> my countries always open
<Ap0k> i thought visiting hours were 1-2 and 6-7?
<deadguy|work> hahahahahahaha
<deadguy|work> I GET IT
<Akranadas> :(
<deadguy|work> PRISON JOKE LOL
<Weavern> win

<Elukka> AND ALL THE GAYS ARE GOING TO DIE
<Riess> I DON'T WANT TO DIE IN 5 YEARS
<Riess> oh shit, timing